sewel vs angau

menaip entry di pagi yg dingin....
huhu...ak br blik dr bilik paan..buat report...
huhu..tiap2 mgu camni...
isk...
actually..ak tgh pendam smething dlm hati..
tp, ak nk ckp kat org..
at least ada la gak org taw...
tp, ak cam xbleh ja nk ckp...
hmmm...ntahla....
ak slalu pikiaq byk2 kali bnda nih...
apa yg xkna kat diri aku nih...
ada la tu..
mata org yg menlai tu lain2...lain gak la first impression dia kat ak...
sapa la aku nih
hmm..ak agk merajuk nih..ak taw..ak xpatut nk rs cmni...
xde hak pon nk rs ap2...
sbenaqnya,ak rs pelik...
tp cam bhgia pon ada gak..
hm..isy..sshla nk ckp..mm2 rs ada..maybe sb da lm xda org yg agk care kat ak camtu kot...
tp...
dia tiba2 ja ada...
n ak xpnah terpk pon dia akn approach ak...
sgt2 xpnah...
dan lani ak rs cam tkt skit...
huhu...
sb ayt2 yg dia bg kat ak...
cam pelik...
ak rs xsesuai dia ckp camtu kat ak..sb ak br knai dia...
bkn ak xska..
tp ak ssh aa nk prcya..
sb ak xnk frust lg...
tp mmg ayt2 dia cam nk l
bih dr kawan..
maybe ak yg cm ala2 perasan..
haha...
mbe kat kwn2 di ayg len pn dia ckp camtu kan..mn la a k taw..
ak xtaw prngai dia cemana...
pnt ak pkiaq..
huhu
watever la...
tp, kalo dia btl2 nk go on something ngn ak...
ckpla btoi...
ak sssh aa nk phm bhs tu...
cam ckp ngn alien pon ada gak..
tp ak sgt2 enjoy ngn dia...
hai..
ntahla apa nk jd..just wait n see...
huhu...
ak ni apa..angau ka???
eeuuwwww...angau sorang2!!!!
swel kot ak rs...
adeh laa....
isk

sorry...

hi...
pnah x kita semua teringat stau bnda nih...
hmmm...
mak ak slalu pesan...
bila cakap. cakap elok2...jgn men sedap mulut je hntam...
huhu...
kita xtaw org bleh terima x ap yg kita ckp...
hmmm...
da lm da ak terigt bnda nih...
especially pas ak msuk uia....
means dr matrik la...
ak ad byk kwn..
ad yg knl mcm tu ja...
ad yg agk rapat...
ad yg sgt rapat..
huhu...
tp mulut org xleh kita duga...
mcm2 org mcm2 perangai kita akn npk...
or even yg kta xpnah taw wujudnya org camtuh...
tetba org camtuh ada dkat dgn kita..
ap kita nk bt..huu
macam haru ja...
tp bg ak...
cemana pelik pon perangai org tu,
betapa annoying gila minah tu,
or betapa sengalnya mamat tuh
smpai kita rs sgt2 bengang ngn org tuh...
kita kn try adapt dgn dia...
ni ikut ap yg mak ak pesan la..
and apa yg aku try bt..
kdg2 kita bleh adapt..kdg2 mmg rs angin gak aaa..
huhu...
tp just calm...or kalo xthn sgt pon...
tutup mata, ttp telinga...
huu
tp..
beware of our words...
kdg2 apa yg kita ckp, xsmstinya semua og bleh terima..even nk tegur utk kebaikan..
a simple sentence can make someone hurt....
huhu...
so, kwn2 kalo slma ni ak pnah ckp ap2 yg ampa sakit ati..
im sorry...
betapa ak beware pon, maybe ad yg takleh terima..kn...
huhu...
sorry....isk...

tekanan perasaan dan emosi...

well
who can predict it
a few minutes before
i feel very happy
ok, not so hapy
but just say that i m happy


and
suddenly each part of my life
becomes worst one by one
and
i dont know how to cope with it suddenly
i feel my stress level slowly increase
grrrrrr...
i cant take this feeling anymore
or in othher words
i need to undrstand and learn hw to trust
especially when someone told u
to believe in him/her
but....
its NOTHING!!!!

my birthday!!!!

26th augut 2009
my 21st birthday....
happily celebrate it...:D
thanx kat semua yg wish...
hehe....
seronok...
happy....
ramai kwn2 yg wish...
luv u guys....
thn ni dpt wish dr kwn2 baru...
means dak2 silat...
hehe...
ak xkn lupa time penghuni2 keta abg saiful nyanyi lagu"allah selamatkan kamu" kt aku...
penghuni2 keta tu adalah kak lin, miza, kak fiza, kam, and abg saiful..
sungguh..
ak sgt2 terharu...
huhu...
xsgka plak ada org yg nak nyanyi camtuh..
hehe
best!!!
then..ad yg wish kt fb, kt fs...
kak imah, kak farihah, sara, adli, afiq, jijan, kak anis, aimi, mista chike, jah,wany, kak mel, hasana, aida, natrah, kak shad....
and maybe ada lg..
thanx...
and classmate aku..
with their sentimental value of present....
ye aa..tgh berhempas pulas bt report lab..huhu
wani ngn ketas handbill ape tah..
tulis happy bithday kat blkg tuh..
haha..
so spontaneous
tiqa dgn ketas a4 garis2 yg mengandungi wasiatnya..
so classic..
haha..
and paan...
dgn roll on perfume and bekas rotan tu...
freshly from her locker..
haha...
so romantic...
wakaka...
ap2 pon, ak sgt appreciate sb depa bg time saa akhir bt report dgn stressnya..
hehe..
thanks dears!!!!
and...
my roomate...
athirah baharudin..
keje gila btul minah nih..
lkat ketas kcik2 tulis happy birthday kat softboard ak..
dgn hadiah kat tgh2 tuh...
hehe..
jiwang gak minah nih..
hehe...
ntah bila la dia lekat...
time ak p kelas kot...
hehe..
best!!!
thanks my dear!!!
hehe..
semua ni da bg ak puas ati...
even ak xda "special someone" yg wish utk ak...
huhu....
thanx friends....
and a very2 extra thanks and love for my mom
that gave birth to me at 26 august 1988
i know its very hard...
and my dad ..
that have give me his love and protection
all of this time
and for my siblings
my beloved siblings
that love and care for me for the past 20 years..
well...im 21 now..
but ur little sister is still the same like before...
u will not lose ur adik manja..haha
anyway..
thanks guys!!!
luv u all!!!

y.....

i dunno why....
last nite....
when im reading a novel....
not a love novel...
a patriotic novel....
suddenly....
i cried....
not because the patriotic feeling....
but the person in the novel died about 2 days before eid mubarak...
and he is planned to get married in the 3rd day of the eid...
tragically...
he died beacuse of an attack by a comunist.....
his mother cant accept the fact...
and then...
i cried...
but as times goes by...
im still crying...
wat da.....
isk...
and then...
i realise....
im not crying because of the story.....
it is because i suddenly remembering something...
that always make my heart cry, sad and feels like....
its gonna explode at that time....
but why i need to cry...
it doesnt want to stop..
i hate it!!!!
seriously......
it was a long time since i last cried....
especially because of that 'something'....
i felt like im aloser...
crying because of that 'something'
'something' that i damnly want to forget....
just get out of my life....
y....

weekend at pd..

ak blik dr pd smlm..blik bwk hdiah.....aku demam!!!!huhu...sedih....takleh p kelas...takleh menimba ilmu...huhu...bgus je ayat...tp ak xla demam cam yg ak pnah demam sblum ni...selalunya kalo demam, ak mmg cam nazak sguh..kali cm tak demam sgt..hihi...parents kat umah da risau sb ak demam...sbnya kalo aku demam...mmg teruk n takleh bgn lgsg..huhu..kali kira ok la..nsib xkena kuarantin....isk..mtk djauhkanla...huhu...


cerita pasal port dickson a.k.a pd.....ak p mclead kat sana...mc lead tuh utk mahallah representative committees a.k.a mrc...best.....sbab bleh jmpa mrc mhlh laen n dpt byk sgt input utk jd mrc..and dpt tmbhkan keyakinan ak nih..huhu...mula2 smpai cam gerun gak la sb yg p tuh suma mrc..muka2 leader..huhu...serius ak tkut..tp bl da lama n pk blik aku pun sm cam depa yg laen gak..still a leader..just maybe experience yg membezakan kami...tp, xsemestinya kalo line up utk mrc tu takpnh ada xperience, program xjln kan..hmmm....ak n kwn2 mrc aku akan bt yg trbaik utk jdkan mrc asiah dipdg tinggi nanti..huih...tak sbq2nya nak buat program..nk collaborate ngn mrc yg len..huhu..hope everything will be fine..hehe....

new life!!!!

skang ni br ak rs cam da msuk sem bru....np??maybe sb ak br rs tunggang langgangnya idup aku ni...haha....plus...ad byk bnda bru yg ak buat sem ni...ak xpnah rncg ak akn bt bnda2 nih..tp tetba ja ak minat and jadi..huhu...

first...
dulu aku jrg ol....lani..kat blik ak da ada wifi uia..blehla aku ol ari2...haha....tp yg tak beshnya, kdg2 blog n fesbuk aku takleh bukak..huhu..sedih...

second...
sem ni ak cam akn bz ngn mrc untuk mahallah asiah..dulu pnah gak teringt nk join..tp ntah nape...cam mls je nk apply..sem ni dapat plak..mybe berkat galakan fellow ak ni kot..haha..thanks madam...mmm..cam menakutkan ja join mrc..sb kn amik taw and care pasal seluruh penghuni mahallah asiah...besaq tuh responsibility...ak plak dpat biro residential n internatonal affairs..huhu..sape soh ak gatal ckp aku nk biro nih..siap bleh bg ayat2 gempak untk meyakinkan madam2 yg interview ak..huhu..padahal..ak suka nama dia je..sb cam sedap...sumpah..haha..swel btol..tp pas beberapa meeting and jmpa senior R n I, adala bertambah sikit keyakinan dlm jiwa nh..haha..emmm weekend ni nak kena join mclead...untuk mrc2 yg br dilantik...huhu..cmbest..tp ak xnak outdootrbyk sgt...xskaaaa!!!!!!nti dkat bpa bulan br ilang sunburn aku...huhu....

third...
aku makin rjin p silat..haha...np?ntahla..mbe sb da biasa and cm dpt smgt bru...tmbh2 plak ak tak grad2 lg dr silat...sb slalu je ad prob time nk ijazah....ak pnah repeat kelas jatuh..and now, ak tgh repeat kelas potong plak...huhu..cm skit ati je rs..huhu..xpe..suma tuh dugaan untuk aku..aku kn sbq byk2..huhu..mudah2an ak dpat grad gak satu hr nant..huhu..hope dpt kepujian time konvo..pegh..buat buah pun xkemas...haha....buah kilas hadapaaaaaaaannnnn....haha...

fourth....
sabtu arituh, kuaq ngn kak fiza, kak lin n kam...hmmm..np xpgl kam kak kam ek???sdgkn spatutnya begitu..huhu...haha..nver mind..tersedak kam..hihi..ok...kmbali ke main point...akbli handbag..emmm..handbag ke kalo besaq nala lgu tuh?tak kesahla..asalkan pink...haha...before nih..ak bwk beg skoah je p kelas..sem ni nk mencuba bnda bru..sb beg skolah tuh cm da nazak..and beg kitty ak da nk trkoyak..tak sgup tgk beg tu koyak..huhu..da la the only kak ipaq yg bg..haha...so, start mgu ni, ak pon bwkla handbag pink aku tuh..waahhh..bahagia btl...da kaler pink...haha...tpiiiiii....kalo ltak buku fluid mechanics ja ak dh rs cam nk tercabut bahu aku...huhu..so..kn pgglaa....huhu..plus td ak br bli bku intro to thermal science and heat transfer...huhu..kn pgg dua2 tuh...ak tak ska pgg2 buku kat tgn...rimas...tp td cam cool ja..haha...

hmm...ak akan usaha sebaik mungkin untuk adapt ngn environment bru nih...yg ak jrg buat or xpnah involve sblum nih...lbih krg cam my new life la...lani ak bleh bt ap2 ja yg aku nak bt.just pk pasal diri aku n xpyh pk 'org lain' nk komen ap...phm2la 'org lain' tuh sapa..aman rsnya hidup ak lani...sb ak da lm tak npk 'org lain' tuh...serius ak rs hepi n bahagia lani..da tkda byg2 dia da...my new live is just started.thanx byk2 kat kawan2, akak2, and sapa2 ja yg pnah bg nasihat kat aku utk start hidup bru n tak sedih2 lg...hehe...thnx sgt!!